You know these little nether region glandular abbesses are sneaky. They can be growing in you, causing creeping, reality stealing, incremental pain. Slowly wearing you into submission.
I was getting more tired. Feeling like something was trying to take over my mind and drag me down. Even after days off, though it was not dawning on me.
A friend from my work said she noticed I was ‘tired’.Thanks for seeing me friend. This is really why we need each other. People who you see on a daily basis know you best.
Our excuses; “The weather is changing, My old scar is sore, I don’t want to be a bother to anyone, I don’t want anyone to feel sorry for me or judge me”.
The nurse told me everyone says the same thing. The last thing you want is another one.
All this fear.
One is so sure this isn’t the same pain and you’re right because they each form in different spots and so manifest differently each time. However…my point is….Denial of our pain is so easy.
I live in a world where denial of pain is the norm.
People tell me this is an issue of repressed anger and letting go. I’m sure it is. For me and the rest of the world too. The challenge is filling in that old spot fully with love.
A great lesson in putting me first all the time. Being courageous enough to respect my feelings. Protecting the right I have as a human to feel them.
I so obviously need to make some visceral art….well… I have time to plot some now.
I see the Universe wants me to sit still again, be here, love me and allow me to create more happiness than ever.